Another day down

B.fast

Cheerios&1% 150

Snack

Banana 80

Lunch

1/2 sandwich with turkey and mustard 145

Bit of Pork stir-fry leftovers 200

Snack

Yogurt 200

Dinner

Bit more of Pork stir-fry 200

Salad with Homemade veggie salsa 100

Dessert

Frozen Yogurt 120

Before bed snack

a few sips of silk soy chocolate milk 20

Exercise
I planted 20 1 gallon Kinnickinick plants.
Helped Mr. D pick up all the grass that he edged off the front yard... major leg and arm workout today. I was definitely feeling the results of only eating 1200 cals tonight as I was trying to continue helping with the project that we were trying to finish. But I know that it will be so worth it when I can fit back into my pre-pregnancy clothes that have been siting dormant waiting to see the sun again.

We went to library reading time this morning and I put Aly's hair up in the cutest piggy tails... I didn't get any pics because my camera batteries were dead. I also don't know where the back-up batteries are because of my special little helper.

today

Today
9am
Special K with 1%---- 210
Half Banana----------40
Water

Pulled weeds outside and watered plants

10:30
Aly and I shared some Non-fat Yogurt--110

12:45
Red/Green Lettuce(2 cups)----30cals
Handful grape tomatos---------25
1 yellow pepper----------------25
handful dried cranberries------150
slice of flax bread with jam-----110
Water
Total so far today 700...........500 to go for the rest of the day at it is 1:40pm. Not bad!
Pilates ab routine 25 minutes

5:15 dinner
Veggie Salsa--------50
2 Steak Flautas-----350


late night drink and snack with the girls
Vodka Martini-----170
Side of Veggies----45

Total--------------1305

Donkey, Doggy, Judy, Baby and Bear

Gangs all here.

Aly has gotten attached to a purple bunny. We named her "Judy" after Steven's Aunt Judy. She was here a few weeks ago and Aly picked up on her name right away. It is really cute when she says it so we had to name bunny that so we can hear her say it all the time. If "bunny judy" isn't in bed with her she will ask "Judy?" She loves to snuggle her close. Missing in this picture is baby... but you did get a bit of bears foot.



We were swimming yesterday and my mom bought her a blow-up donkey. She figured out how to bounce on it very quickly and she even caught on the the fact that we were calling it a donkey. She called it dunkee. Too cute. She can also play with Lego's now without putting then in her mouth. She loves to take a bunch and put them in a container and then take them out one by one. You know the little yellow dudes that are part of the Legos. She calls them "Guy". We have started to be able to actually have a two way conversation with her. She is beginning to have an opinion. She can say "ya" and "no" to a question that I ask her. Of course the answer that she gives isn't always the way that she gets to have things go.



Calorie monitoring is going well. I have lost 2 pounds already. Not bad for 1 week.

30 to go.

So my sis in law Shan and I are back in the saddle again of counting calories and working out. For me it has been a while since I have been on and off again prego over the last 2 years. It is just amazing how quickly my body adjusts to eating 1200 calories a day. I had a 3/4 of a can of tuna and a yellow bell pepper for lunch and I'm full. It really helps to write down the caloric intake...because at the end of the day on Friday I was only at 750... after dinner. So I got to have more dinner and a bit of chocolate frozen yougart to get me up to 1200 cals. I have the same amount of energy, actually even more now that I've been working out again. I'm so sick of looking the way I do and I'm determined not to stop until I lose 30 pounds. The losing always starts out slow... which doesn't help the motivation. But once my body resets it's metabolism and starts tapping into all that stored up fat I need to burn off... it will only be a matter of time before I start to shrink. I'm so looking forward to wearing all my old pre-prego clothes. I hope that they arn't to out of style.

Our nieghbors had married off one of their daughters this last Saturday. I helped do the flowers and decorate. The rain held off and it was such a beautiful wedding.

Yes I did, but she's not here.

I knew that it was going to happen sooner or later. I was at Target and ran into an old friend. She asked the dreaded question. "Hey did you have a baby?". I think that I handled it quite well. I didn't burst into tears, because I was having a low emotional day. I just proceeded with the conversation. Yes, I did have a baby but that she was still born. Yuck, I just don't like that word. Makes me feel like I failed at growing and birthing my baby. I told her the short version of what had happened. Water broke, Labor began, Hemorrhage, No heart beat, Baby girl born. She just stared wide-eyed at me probably thinking about the two children she had sitting in her grocery cart and wondering how she could have ever left the hospital without them. When I was telling her what had happened to me and how it was actually life-threatening to me and that I could have bled to death ( a thought that I have not completely dealt with yet) I felt like I was just talking about it so nonchalantly. It was like I was telling her a story about someone else that I knew and not myself. I feel like since I can talk about it without crying that I've gotten over it and moved on with my life. I know that is so not the case. I think about Hazel Hope so often and miss her so much. I have been trying to deal with the trauma of seeing others with babies that are 7 weeks old and not losing it. I think that I'm doing pretty well. I have a journal almost done that I've recapped the whole event... start to finish. Even though I put the journal down at the point of when we are at the hospital the next day and people are starting to come and see us. I have had to take breaks with that journal, because I've been so detailed with it that it is almost like reliving the short time that we had with our Hazel.

Me ~ God is doing a major work in my life. All revolving around Hazel Hope and her short little life. I have been awakened to the holy spirit that has been with me all along. I can hear the Lord speaking to me in the quiet moments that I'm concentrating on listening. I also have been writing what I've been hearing down. Thanks to Margie, because she has an amazing story to tell regarding that. Which in itself is a miracle work. I've started to run on the treadmill again.. which feels great. I haven't been able to because I was prego...nursing...prego. Things jiggle in places that never use to jiggle... I hope that I can just jiggle them away! Also, I've started a home business with Arbonne International. It is a Pure-Safe and Beneficial line of Swiss Skin Care. Check it out at www.arbonne.com I'm having fun telling people about the great product and I've even had people ask what I'm doing different with my skin. Makes a girl feel good.

Hey Boys

At Henry's 1st birthday party Aly was the only girl amongst lots of little boys. When we walked in the door to the party everyone was like... whoa a girl. I didn't bring her a swimsuit so she had to go swimming and playing in the sand leaving nothing to the imagination. But it didn't matter she got down and dirty all the same. If these two could talk would the conversation go something like this?

Henry- "Hey baby did you see my rake?"

Aly- "Yah I saw your rake... not to impressive".

Henry- "What about this sweet sand box I got for my birthday!"

Aly- "Now that I like. It is much cleaner than the sand I get to play in at my house. You should come over and see the dirt piles I play in."

Henry- "Hey can you get your hand off my foot, your cramping my style. I need some room to play you know".

Aly- "Sorry buddy, just giving you some birthday love".

one of my favorite days of the year

4th of July

Neighbors

Home Made Ice Cream

Fireworks

Smores

Friends

Family

Love

Laughter

Happy Faces

Home Cooked

Music

Dancing

Moonlight

Memories

Patriotic Songs

Flannel PJ Pants

nite nite.

This is what a tired little girl looks like after a bbq and playing in the sun and the dirt. She is all lathered up in sunscreen which does wonders when playing in the dry dirt. It is almost like I put a glue stick all over her... it just attracts dirt. She got a wipey bath before the ride home. She is at the stage of trying to say what ever we say. Everyday she says a new word. Hat, babyduck, buckle...etc. She is also at the stage of not wanting to eat in her highchair... what is up with that?