Yah Hoo for Jim and Pam.

I was a little worried they were going to not be together.

Pam looked so good with her hair down.. what a cute couple.

Awesome for Dwight and Angela... farm folks do what city folks can't. Put animals in pain out of their misery. I think I know some people like that... Brownie...garbage can style. Mr. D hates cats so her was thinking the fact that Sprinkes getting put out of her misery was great. French Fry bags clawed to shreds... good one. Poor little kitty woke up from her antihistamine sleep.

If you don't watch his show... you should start! It is SO funny.

Great quote " I'm not superstitious... just some stitious." -Michael Scott

All in all... Great Premiere. Looking forward to the season.

Anyone out there know when Lost on abc premieres? I have looked on the website and didn't see it. Another one of my favorite shows. It was so hard to follow, but if you rent the past seasons and watch them one after the other (no commercials) it is easy to catch up. As Mr.D and I did for like 3 months straight. Gotta love netflix and the 1 dvd at a time. Get it-watch it-send it back. We are to cheap to pay for the 3 dvd's at a time. Which would make so much a difference because you get to have a dvd while you are waiting for another one. It is getting to be fall time again and about time to restart up our netfilx membership. Here's to fall...

Early Sunsets

Movie nights

Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Cookies

Cool Mornings

Last Few Sunny Days

Fall Leaves

Foggy View of the Mountains

Candles

Blankets

Sweaters

Dont you want to just be here... bundled in a blanket writing in your journal or reading a book?

All Y'all

Ask spoken by Miss. D
Abum (Adam)
Chen (Jen)
Kebmum (Kevin)
Erica
Cody
Aunt (Shannon)
Unter (Hunter)
Rah Rah (Rachelle)
Tim
Todd (Uncle and Neighbors Dog)
Gramma
Grammy
Papa
Papa Noisy (my grandpa...he uses the blower in his yard and she remembers that)
Donna
Cheryl (my mom's neighbor)
Jack (my mom's neighbor)
Hayhull (Hazel)
Jesus
Addy me (Aly)
Cauwwee (Carrie)
Jesse (Jessica)
Egg (Greg our Neighbor and my uncle)
Eya (Eva)
Whull (Will)
Katie
Erin
Judy (bunny, Mr. D's Aunt)

Great Weekend Of Nothin'

I had the most relaxing weekend at home with my girl. Much needed after last week of being gone everyday. I really wore Miss A. out last week. She took a long nap on Saturday and on Sunday. Mr. D went out of town with his bro and kiddos. Aly and I stayed home all day Saturday, ventured out on Sunday for Church and then stayed home the rest of Sunday. What do I always do when Mr. D goes out of town you may wonder? I paint. There is something about being home alone that inspires me to paint. I have had a quart of brown paint waiting to be used up for about a year. I bought it last hunting season, when I painted the downstairs bathroom blue. I wanted to do a brown accent wall in there and I got it almost done this weekend. I need a ladder to reach to the ceiling to cut in the brown. It looks so nice and chocolatly. I caught up on my BSF study last night. I love the studies this year, so much more than last year. I think it is because so much in my life has changed over the past few months and God is so much more real to me. I have had to rely on Him completly and studing His Word makes Him so much more close to me. I have an insight into His words and it is like He is always speaking directly into my life.

I will sing of His love FOREVER!

Psalm 103
Of David. 1 Praise the LORD, O my soul;
all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
2 Praise the LORD, O my soul,
and forget not all his benefits-
3 who forgives all your sins
and heals all your diseases,
4 who redeems your life from the pit
and crowns you with love and compassion,
5 who satisfies your desires with good things
so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.
6 The LORD works righteousness
and justice for all the oppressed.
7 He made known his ways to Moses,
his deeds to the people of Israel:
8 The LORD is compassionate and gracious,
slow to anger, abounding in love.
9 He will not always accuse,
nor will he harbor his anger forever;
10 he does not treat us as our sins deserve
or repay us according to our iniquities.
11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his love for those who fear him;
12 as far as the east is from the west,
so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
13 As a father has compassion on his children,
so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;
14 for he knows how we are formed,
he remembers that we are dust.
15 As for man, his days are like grass,
he flourishes like a flower of the field;
16 the wind blows over it and it is gone,
and its place remembers it no more.
17 But from everlasting to everlasting
the LORD's love is with those who fear him,
and his righteousness with their children's children-
18 with those who keep his covenant
and remember to obey his precepts.
19 The LORD has established his throne in heaven,
and his kingdom rules over all.
20 Praise the LORD, you his angels,
you mighty ones who do his bidding,
who obey his word.
21 Praise the LORD, all his heavenly hosts,
you his servants who do his will.
22 Praise the LORD, all his works
everywhere in his dominion.
Praise the LORD, O my soul.


Acts 3:16
By faith in the name of Jesus, this man whom you see and know was made strong. It is Jesus' name and the faith that comes through him that has given this complete healing to him, as you can all see.

Genesis 9:7
As for you, be fruitful and increase in number; multiply on the earth and increase upon it."

Matthew 17:20
He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."
Matthew 17:19-21 (in Context) Matthew 17 (Whole Chapter)


I have a Septate Uterus and it is solved by a simply surgery. I can have the surgery next month and I will heal within a few months and have a uterus that is just like anyone's normal uterus. The surgery will remove the tissue septate that seperates the interior of my uterus. My preterm labor and preterm loss of baby percentage will decrese from 50% to 5%! Can you believe it. Praise God! He has heard our prayers and answered them.

Still going!

Just an update on the 1200 calorie intake...
I've been slacking off on the working out lately.
But I have been keeping up with the low calorie intake.
I'm down 17 pounds!
THANK YOU VERY MUCH!
I started this end of July. Not bad for 2 months!
I fit into some jeans I haven't worn since I went to Clark...8 years ago!
I'm starting to be able to see my cheek line!

Truly Scrumptious

Bang Bang Chitty Chitty Bang Bang Our fine four fendered friend!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I just put on a movie for Aly. She is a bit young to like this movie... but I like to have on. It was one of my favorites. I even like the name Truly... Mr. D was not to sure about that one. Maybe we will be able to use it later. I hear my results of my MRI tomorrow at 2pm. God says be anxious in nothing... so I have to trust the WORD! It is my only source of reliance. BSF started and I'm loving it. Our group is very vibrant in sharing. I'm also feeling more confident with my sharing because I feel I have grown so much in the last few months. We have fellowship next week and I'm sure that my recent life tragedy will make it into the conversation, but I know that God placed me in this group for a reason and so I can't wait to find out why..! One of my dearest life friends joined me this year in BSF and she was able to be placed in a group and not on the waiting list to get into a group. And out of all the groups she could be placed in she was put in my group. I just know that we are going to have a great year growing together! Also, I hope that we don't have any of our laugh attacks. We have been known to start and be unable to stop and we have been kicked out of a college class when we were visiting a friend at WSU! Not one of my proudest moments. But...sometimes you just can't stop!!! Here's to a great year at BSF. I hope that the Lord will grow my heart closer to him as I study the book of Matthew.

And pretty O pretty Chitty Chitty Bang
Chitty Chitty Bang Bang we Love you.
Near Chitty Far Chitty Anywhere you are
On Chitty Chitty We Depend...
Bang Bang Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
Our Fine Four Fendered Friend,
Bang Bang Chitty Chitty Bang Bang,
Our Fine Four Fendered Chitty Chitty Friend!

MRI

I have a MRI today.
Please pray for a clean bill of health.
I'm ready for all my body questions to be answered.
Knowledge is good.
My faith is being tested.
I know that I'm not in control.
God holds me in His hand and I can rest and be peaceful.
He will never forsake me.

Friday tomorrow...WHAT?

I'm not quite sure where this week has gone. I know that it was a short week because we got home from Boston late Monday night... but that doesn't explain how tomorrow is already Friday. I have had 3 Arbonne presentations this week, BSF started....yay Kimmy is in my group...Childcare for the Mom's study at Church on Thursday am... Arbonne in the evening. Tomorrow, home in the morning and then Arbonne in the afternoon at my Aunts house! Then it is Mr. D's birthday on Saturday. You might think that I have something great planned by looking at the totally inspiring blog of my sis-in-law Shannon.... but no, I just asked him tonight..."what do you want to do for your bday?" He said no to going out and staying in to have friends over! Hmmmmm, I will have to change his mind. A girl needs an excuse to make a gourmet meal and bake a cake doesn't she? My right eye has been hurting today. Totally random fact, I'm sure it is appreciated. It feels like my tear duct is all scratchy. I actually put some Visine in to it today. I haven't put eye drops in in how knows long. I was standing in front of the mirror holding down my lower eyelid wondering if I was going to have a problem putting this eye drop in. Remember the Friends episode when Rachel had a problem putting the eye drops in? Monica tackled her and held her down to put the eye drop in.
Well I prevailed... no freak out. It did feel better for a while and now as I sit here writing I don't think that it hurts anymore.

Flying Fast!

Scootin' around Nantucket!

Cape Cod

Having a great time in Cape Cod. We head home today after a busy weekend of fun. We spent the day in Nantucket yesterday on a scooter. We powered all around the island to see as much as possible. We thumbed through a real estate binder while eating lunch and I don't think we will be moving here....! A tiny house on a tiny lot went for 1.5 mil! It is so pretty here and the beach sand is like rock salt. Also, the water is like 65'. So warm compared to the fridged Pacific Coast. Long fight home today, but we have our portable DVD player to pop in a movie. On the way back to the airport today we are going to make a stop at Plymouth Rock and try to get in a tour of the main Garden Nursery in the Cape. Off to my breakfast served here at the Inn!

Arrrgh........

Like the pirate teeth?

Got together with the D family yesterday. My nephews 5th Pirate Birthday party. Shannon did an awesome job on the decorations. She did this life-size pixelated picture of Colt in his Jack Sparrow costume. You can see it in the background of the picture above. See her link at the side for more fun design ideas.

I had to post this picture... isn't Miss D such a funny girl. She has the cutest expressions lately. .

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We are off this weekend to the East Coast for our Anniversary. Should be a fun time... Plymouth Rock, Boston Tea party Reinactment...

Happy 6th Anniversary to us!

Yumm-o

This was my dinner the other night. Steven commented on how gross it looked. But I thought that it was a work of art. Blackberries from my yard. Tomatoes from my grandparents yard and yellow cucumbers from my neighbors yard. A little mango peach salsa to top it off. VERY low cal and VERY yummy. It was so big that I only ate half of it.

By the way.......down 15 pounds. I caved and got on the scale. I was being pressured by all you impatient people out there.

Like you care...

Meaningless bit of info...
I bought size 5 diapers at Costco yesterday. They just looked huge. How could my little baby be in SIZE 5 DIAPERS???? After like 9 months of buying size 4, I thought she could move up to the next size. I came to this decision after numerous mornings where she had soaked through the front of her diaper and her jammy pants where all wet. She gets a cup of milk before bed... but not enough to soak through a diaper. She sleeps on her tummy and so all the wetness is in the front and hardly any in the back. It even sometimes is so wet that the little diaper crystals things are on her. Gross. So I'm hoping that size 5 will hold all the wetness so I don't run out of pj bottoms every week.
Are you feeling more complete about life after knowing this piece of information?

Weekend Fun

We stayed close to home this weekend because Mr. D was under the weather. We had family over on Sunday night. That was great fun. The little girls were so cute playing together. We shared some dinner and watched the NASCAR race. Darn Jimmy Johnson won... But Carl Edwards was close behind him. I was so hoping for a Jimmy crash so that Carl could win.... but no such luck. I guess 2nd is ok. And then my other fav Greg Biffle got like 13th... c'mon Greg pull it together. You gained like 32 spots with an awesome pit and you still got 13th. I'm still pulling for him. There are only a few races left before the chase. Maybe that was a little TMI about Nascar...but hey I'm a fan ok. Still love me!

So, I tackled Miss D's room. It needed a little girl transformation. I did some of Shannon's wall art.We took a trip to Ikea on Monday (along with the entire state). I picked up one of those hangy mesh things to hold all her "friends". She loved to put them "in there". I had the pink flower light from the nursery... I wanted to get another one at Ikea but they were out of the pink flowers.. so I got the green Ladybug. That is my bed spread and my doll house from when I was a little girl. That black mirror was in that room from before when it was our extra bedroom. I had that green piece of furniture down stairs in the entry way, but I saw it in a new light when it could be used to hold all her books. Her Auntie Kristin gave her the butterfly mobile for her 1st birthday. Now all it needs is a fun coat of paint. But that is low on the priority list. Mr. D isn't a fan of painting(since he already painted the entire house while building) so getting him to help me would be a minor miracle.Yes, I did paint the flowers in the pictures next to the black mirror. I'm not much of a painter.. but I gave it my best effort. I had made like 6 of those for her nursery and now some of them are in her bathroom. I also got those frames in the bright colors from Ikea. Man, Ikea is awesome.

Vintage Toy Box

Here is a tribute to a few of my favorite things from time growing up. I taught myself how to frenchbraid hain on my Rainbow Brite doll.

Such great memories.

Gotta love those Garbage Pail Kids (6th grade)

My cousin and I had Pound Puppies.

Anyone remember Popples... I loved them.

I had a set of Moon Shoes and they were so fun!
I took my PogoBall to grade school with me. That was so awkward to carry on the bus!

My Lemon Meringue Doll... I could sqeeze her tummy and she would blow out Lemon Scented air. And would you believe that I was over at my parents help them clean out some things and I found this doll... very worn out and SHE STILL SMELLED LIKE LEMON! Makes you wonder what they put in there to make it last 20 years. Hmmmm?

Cape Cod here we come.

Just booked it. Always scary when you click "complete purchase"~!

We are headed to Cape Cod for our 6th anniversary next weekend. You may think... just for the weekend? We leave Friday night and get to Cape Cod at 7am. Thanks goodness for sleeping pills. We will just drug ourselves and sleep tight (i hope). Then on Monday we get home at about 4pm. Just perfect. The little tot gets to have some quality Grandparent time and we get away! We wanted to go somewhere that we have never been so Martha's Vineyard, Nantucket, Whale Watching, JFK Memorial, Cape Cod's only Microbrewery and Cape Cod's Central Railroad here we come. Wohoo!

My new Bling

I was given a loose diamond as a remembrance of Hazel from someone very special.. I was also told to have it made into a necklace that I could give to Little Miss A at her graduation. So I took it in to our jeweler and began to describe what I wanted. I wanted to model the necklace after something special to me. As I started to describe a heart our jeweler went over to her desk and said that she had one made and thought it might be what I was wanting. It was perfect. One of their jewelers (the one who made my wedding ring) had handcrafted this heart and the size of the heart would off set the size of the diamond perfect. So I left the loose diamond(always a bit scary... never know if your going to get the same one back) and they set the diamond in a setting and attached it to the heart. I wanted the bail to be set on the necklace so that it layed a bit sideways. Isn't it pretty. So I will have this as a remembrance (one of many that have been given to me by very special people) necklace and I will someday give it to my daughter so she can have a reminder of her sister in Heaven.

Happy/Sad/What?

~HAPPY~

~SAD~

Here are a few more CUTE ones from our Church Picnic.

Like I said in a previous post... I taught her how to frown.


~WHAT?~

Sweet New Baby

One of my dear friends had a baby on Monday. Her and I had talked in depth about what would happen after her birth. If I would come see her... if I wouldn't. I had told her I didn't know how I would react.... I haven't held or been around any newborns since I lost Hazel. In my heart I really didn't know how I would react. I had been in close proximity to a newborn and I had a panic atttack. I didn't see it coming, it just hit me. We were at a park for a birthday party and someone I am aquaited with had her baby there. She and I were due at the same time, so her baby was the same age that Hazel would have been. I took one look at the baby and had to excuse myself. Thankfully we were at a large park and I walked away very quickly without being rude and composed myself. I kept my distance after that. But with my dear friend I thought that it would be different. I had been there for her the whole pregnancy and I was excited to meet her new baby. I went to the hospital on the day that she had the baby. Just as I was getting out of my car one of my friends that I hadn't seen since Hazel's funeral was walking by. She was a lady that was in my group at BSF . I hadn't seen her in a while and it was such God's timing that she walked by just as I was getting out of my car. We chatted for a few and she told me I looked good and that gave me a boost of confidance to walk into the hospital. Also, I was distracted as I was walking into the hospital until I got up to the 4th floor... because I was on the phone with another friend. Before I knew it I was walking past the room that I was in with Hazel. I was doing TOTALLY FINE. I had pictured myself having a melt down in the hospital earlier in my mind... but I was fine. My friends hubby met me in the hallway and we walked in to the room. She was nursing the baby. We talked as she finished up and then I washed my hands to hold the baby. I wasn't on auto-piolot at all. I took the baby into my arms and she was SO cuddly and pretty and ALIVE. What an awesome thing that life goes on and there is hope for her little life. She survived the c-section and was making the sweetest little frowns and grunts right there in my arms. I changed her little diaper. Again, I was just enjoying the feel of a chubby little newborn in my arms. I hadn't held a baby since I held Hazel and I wasn't even hesitant to hold her at all. The thoughts of guilt that I thought I would have weren't there. I thought for sure that I wouldn't be able to bring myself to hold her... but I did and I didn't even have to pause to think about it. I suppose that means that I'm healing.
Then your light shall break forth like the morning, Your healing shall spring forth speedily, And your righteousness shall go before you; The glory of the Lord shall be your rear guard. Then you shall call, and the Lord will answer; You shall cry, and He will say, Here I am. Is. 58:8-9

Weekend Times

Saturday we took a trip down to Canby for the Swan Island Dahlia Festival. There were acres and acres of Dahlias. It was so beautiful. We walked up and down the rows of flowers and we wrote down our favorites. I would love to have a garden like this will so many Dahlias. I was so inspired to get to planting some Dahlias for next summer. I just love these flowers so much. There are so many varieties... I could just plant them all. They were also selling cut dahlias for $5/bunch. I bought 3 bunches. An Orange, Coral and Red bunch... and ohhh they are just SO pretty. Hey have I talked enough about Dahlia? Can't see them to well.... but I was wearing some capri jeans that I haven't wore since before I was pregnant with Aly....

Moooooving on.

We had our 3rd Annual Church Picnic on Sunday at the park. It was much better weather this year. Last year it was like 90' and little miss aly was a young little tot. She had much more fun this year.... I didn't do to well with my caloric intake at the picnic. I made some zucchini bread and put this icing drizzle on it..... mmmm so good. I had like 2 pieces. I had to have a skimpy dinner. But is was so worth it. I taught Aly how to frown... she is so cute when she mimics me. Here is Mr. D frowning and Aly looking at him. Also... A friend known as Grandpa Ed at church was taking here for a walk and she made sure that he knew about her "oweee" on her knee. She pointed to her knee and said "fall" so he had to give her a band aid and for the rest of the picnic she was showing everyone her band aid. Her "oweee" was so old... there wasn't even that big of scab there. She was just hamming it up with her "oweee".

My Meme

The Meme Rules:

1. I have to post these rules before I give you the facts.
2. Each player starts with eight random facts/stories about themselves.
3. People who are tagged need to write their own blog (about their eight things) and post these rules.
4. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.
5. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.


Here we go.


#1. If I'm somewhere other than home I absolutly cannot stand on someone else's bathmat. It totally grosses me out. (No offence... it's not you it's me)

#2. I hate to clean house. I have to pretend in my own head that I'm cleaning someone else's house so that I don't skimp and cut corners. I know that if I do I'm going to have to clean it sometime, so I may as well buck up and do it. ( I was cleaning the shower as I thought of this one.)

#3. I cannot stand having long toenails. It also grosses me out to see others have a french pedicure. I know that you have to have semi-long toenails to have one of those and I just wonder... what is underneath those long toenails? You can't see it because of the polish. I just know that there is yucky stuff under there and I just can't stand to have my toenails even the slightest bit long. I have to cut them!

#4. When I was 8ish I was playing the game "let's see if I can knock you over while I swing backwards and you run back and forth behind me"... you may think hmmmm, not a very safe game. Well I guess that fact wasn't to important to me at the time. I was on the swing and was swinging my darnedest to knock over a friend. I proceeded to fall out of the swing face first. My head landed on the cedar chip cover of the ground and my body landed on the step below on the the grass. I bit completely through my bottom lip. I can remember running over to my mom in the house and pulling at her apron and seeing her look down in horror at my bloody face. I had to get stitches to close up my lip and to this day you can feel the scar tissue in my lip and see where my teeth went through to the other side. Ask to see it... it is cool. By the way... don't let your children play that game.

#5. I wanted to name our first child Hazel. Steven had said no way... that is a Grandma name. So we decided on Alyenna if she was a girl. I then I wanted to name our next child Hazel and Steven said no. Until she was born we didn't have a name. I don't remember if it was before or after I delivered our second baby girl that I exclaimed I want to name her Hazel amongst my tears. And Mr. D said "It is Perfect". He came up with her middle name. (Hope)
This is the complete meaning of her name ( we didn't know this until some information was gathered and given to us. )
Hazel- found in Greek, Hebrew and Old English
One who sees God, Commanding Authority, and the vision of God, One who God watches over, God sees. Also, from hazel nuts come oil. In the Bible, oil is for anointing and represents the Holy Spirit's presence and power.
Hope- Eph 1 and Eph 4..... confident assurance of adequate resources...and confident expectation based on solid certainty (of Who God is)
She is in Heaven now and sees God, God is watching over her in Heaven. Interesting stuff huh!
Some of this is the words of my mother-in-law... Thanks to her friend for researching this and telling us.

#6. I have been the product of a miracle. A placeta abruption can be life-threatening to the mother. She can bleed to death. I had a sudden very large blood loss at home and needed an ambulance to take me to the hospital.My mother-in-law was praying and laying hands on my belly while I was in labor to speak to Hazel Hope, so that the power of Jesus would give her life. Those prayers were for me and we didn't know it until after and we realized it. I was ok and my recovery time was very fast. Praise God.

#7. I shave my arm hair so that it is shorter.

#8. I roll and rustle around in bed until I am completely comfortable and it bugs the *%$# out of Mr.D!


Tagged.

Shannon, Kelli, Kristin, Martta, Erica (you need to jump on the blogging bandwagon!!!), Beckie F., Shannon's sis (Kim), Jodi ( you have a blog don't you???)

Yumm-0

This little girl loves her self some corn on the cob. She saw the leftovers in the fridge at about 10am and said "corn". So I gave her a corn on the cob morning snack. She can finish a whole cob! And yes if your wondering I'm not looking forward to seeing it again... and I know I will, because I'm sure that some of it didn't get chewed. Miss D. amazes me with her vocab. I was counting to 10 as I was brushing her hair... you know like Marsha. 1,2,3,4,5........................100. Well, I was only going to make it to 10 with this active little girl. So as I was counting the strokes... 1,2,3 and then she said 4! What? I continued on with 6,7,8,9 and then she said 10! WHAT? Did that really happen? Did I hear that right? No way? Steven and I look at each other like yah right... fluke. Craziness. I will try that again tomorrow after she is out of her bath and I'm brushing her hair again. I wonder what she will say next....?

Post number 100

100 posts...wow. It is interesting to look back and read some really old ones. It really is like an online journal. I need to print these out and put them in a binder or something. I had my first Arbonne class tonight. It went SO WELL. For those of you who are thinking... hey why didn't I get invited? Here is what I have to say. It is SO much better to keep these classes small so that everyone can get their questions answered and we aren't there until the wee hours of the morning. People have to get home to their loved ones. I was home by 9:30pm. Not to bad! Anyways, 3-5 people is perfect. So it was just my first class and I am learning... so that I will be able to do these classes on my own. Right now I have someone helping my with my 1st 4-6 classes. I have a list of 100 people that I want to share Arbonne with and it is only a matter of time until you might hear me talking about it. Feel free to ask me anything about Arbonne. If I don't know I will get you the answer. Tonight was so fun. I love talking about skin-care that I have experienced and that actually is great for my body. No animal yuck...just pure stuff from the earth. I could sit here and type and type about it... but I won't push the hard sale on you. I'm just excited to share. Moving on...
_________________________

My little dearest is getting to be so verbal. She can answer my questions now and she has her own opinion. Mr. D watched her tonight while I was at my class. I called on my way home to tell him where I was he had said that he had just put her to bed. They were playing and when he would ask her if she wanted to go to bed... she would say no. But a little while later she said yes. I wonder what goes on in that little mind of hers that she would be able to discern when she was ready to go to bed on not. There are also funny little things that we are learning about her. Last night her grammy gave her a dolly and a little giraffe. They were held together like the doll was holding the giraffe. Well she didn't like that and she wanted them separated. Also she didn't like the tag on the back of the doll and she wanted it cut off. After papa cut the tag off she pointed to the back of the doll letting her papa know that he didn't cut all of the tag off. Hmmmm. She sure likes it the way she likes it. I wonder where she gets that from... Mr.D I bet. Not a bad trait... it's all in the details I suppose. I'm sure not like that and she spends most of her time with me. Nature vs. Nurture going on I guess.

Sleep...so good.

So here is the final product. I added a bit of bling and a bit of memories. I took some of the dried flowers from Hazel's casket piece that I had dried and used the mod podge to glue those on and then I glued some beads on there too. I think they turned out pretty well. I'm going to show a friend how to do this project over the weekend. She can't wait until we have our next craft night at church. She is big into scrapping and so she has a ton of paper choices.

Aly just amazes me by the amount that this girl can sleep. She just loves it. Today she woke up at her normal time...6:45-7am. I have a doctor appt today at 1pm and I have to have a blood test done before that at noon and then I'm meeting a friend at 11:30 to pick up my Re9 Arbonne Anti-aging skincare set. So I'm thinking hmmmm, when can this girl get her morning nap in? So I decided to try and see if she would be down with going back to bed at 8:30 that way she could sleep and be up in time to leave. I gave her a cup of milk and we sat and read a story then I said "time for a nap" and she laid right down on her pillow and reached back for her "niney" and was down for the count. Everyone had to be there and it is just crazy how she knows if anyone is missing. Bear, Bunny Judy and baby. She will ask for her froggy...but froggy stays in the car along with buddy. Man when I recount how many little friends my daughter has it sounds a bit weird. Sometimes I will take one out of her bed to see if she notices if it is gone and SHE DOES. She asks me "bear?" "go?" with her hands out and upside down in the "i don't know" way. What a funny little girl. She is so in love with her "niney".... when she sees it after being outside playing or away from it for a while... she breaks out it this laughter like "ohhhh my niney where have you been?" "i have missed you so." She laughs and hugs it and lays on the floor and rubs her face in it. Yes, she loves her "niney".

Must keep going.

Still going strong...
Today
Cheerios with 1% 120
coffee with 1% and a dabble of chocolate syrup 165
yogurt with a small amount of oatmeal flakes 140
1/2 tortilla shell with a dabble of homemade hummus and spinach leaves 90
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hmmm what should I make for dinner?
I did my pilates accelerated with my "sculpting circle"... It is starting to get a little easier... I suppose that means that I'm getting stronger! Yeah for results.
I have noticed that my body is getting slimmer. I haven't got on the scale though, I don't want to be discouraged by that number. I'm waiting as long as I can, so that when I do get on the scale I'm encouraged by the number. After Aly gets up from her marathon nap... put her down at 1:15ish and she is still sleeping... I'm going for a walk down to the mailbox. If you have seen where we live you know that we have a great hill to walk up. When I'm pushing the stroller my heart gets to a racing pace very quickly. By the time I get up to the house I'm a huffing puffing fool. I have jell-o legs from walking without stopping. Push it...Push it...the neighbors might be watching...I don't want to look like a wimp... Keep pushing.
Hmmm what should I make for dinner? I use to make out meal plans for the month so that I didn't have this dilemma. I need to do that again. Time to go put the coffee table back after my workout. Shannon how are you doing with your trek to a better body?

A day at the fair

We went to the fair last week. Aly had fun with her friend Samantha and I had fun with my friend Jodi. Aly liked looking at the animals. Here she was showing the cow her "buddy." After a while in the stroller and lunch the girls actually slept. We were walking up and down the aisles in the building and it didn't take to long and they both fell asleep. I think that they slept for about 1 hour and a half. This is after she woke up. We were at the fair for about 4 1/2 hours. We had a yummy expensive lunch...gotta love fair food. Jodi indulged in some pie and ice cream...much deserved for her considering she is due to have a baby any day now.
All in all it was a fun day at the fair. What topped it off was that we had free passes for parking and entrance! Thanks to a friend of Jodi!

inspired to get a craftin'

Inspired by Shannon's art and crafting blog entry, I decided to take on the task. She wrote out all the directions on how to do it.. and hey I can read...why can't I do it. I went to Craft Warehouse and picked out some paper and the rest of the things that I needed and whalaah...see below. Not bad I must say for my first craft. I'm going to do another one that kinda goes along with it... but I thought one would be a good start for tonight. I'm going to hang it in my bathroom. When I'm laying in my tub there is a wall across from me with nothing on it. Now I have a custom piece of art that I MADE! Thanks Shan! (see her blog link on the side of my page... she was chosen as "a creative blog") Which way should I hang it...vertical or horizontal? Like the bling beads that I'm going to glue on?

Life Changing Lessons

Bible Study Fellowship
God is in the smallest details. A friend told me about BSF. I decided to look into the it. I was at a point in my life where I was thinking that maybe it was a fit for me. It runs during the school year and is a faith based work (free). I decided to go to the opening meeting. I'm a fairly shy person and I don't seek out large groups of people where I don't know anyone. I had my friend with me and we were there together(comfort in numbers right?). When you are joining for the first time to BSF you get put on a waiting list. As they are forming the groups they need to make sure there are enough leaders to compensate all the new people wanting to join. I was placed in a group the first week and was able to start the study of the book of Romans. That study changed my life. God was teaching me and preparing me for the biggest trial of my life. It was to come 2 weeks after I finished the 32 week study. I became pregnant a few weeks into BSF. As the study went along I grew with each week. The ladies in my group were in anticipation for the baby to come and were excited to come and see me after the delivery. At our last fellowship meeting together we shared lunch and talked about what we had learned and what had stuck out to us over the course of the study. I don't remember what I said then, but I've started to go back and look through my notes and my lessons to see what my answers were. I wrote a ton of notes about suffering.
Romans 5:3-5 says And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulations produces perseverance; and perseverance, character; and character, hope. Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.
My notes from the lecture on that lesson talk about suffering and how God can use it in our lives. God uses suffering to direct us...or to motivate us to change. God uses suffering to inspect us- to show us his strength. God uses suffering to correct us- to show us where we are wrong. God uses suffering to protect us- God uses stuff to happen to us to direct us back to him. God is working his good purposes in all our circumstances. Little did I know that I was going to have to rely on these truths when I gave birth to my baby girl at 35 weeks gestation and she was stillborn. I had a placenta abruption and my baby's blood supply was cut of and she passed away to Heaven on May 30th, 2007. Since that day God has used my suffering to draw me back to him. He has shown himself to me and my family in so many circumstances that we have began to make a list of all the things so that we will never forget. The list is going on 3 pages long. I'm still recalling things. One of the questions in the lesson on Romans 5: 1-11 was Do I have peace with God? My answer on 11/08/06 was "Yes, but I have to remind myself often that He is in total control and He knows what is best for my life". I still feel the same way and find I still have to remind myself that God is in control, but now I'm wondering how could giving birth to a stillborn 5 pound completely normal baby be best for my life? I may never know this side of Heaven. Another question on my lesson from 11/08/06 was How has God used suffering in your life to produce perseverance, character and hope? I answered that "Living in the world today, I haven't had much of any suffering, but that I would have to rely on God to get me through the hard time and when there is nothing left to hold to God is always there."
I can now say with total honesty that is true of me. There have been such sad days where I didn't know how I could go on without my baby here on earth with me. I don't get to enjoy her smiles or her 1st steps. In those sad moments I'm reminded that I could never have given her the life on earth that she now has in Heaven. She will never know suffering, sadness or hurt. She is in glorious beauty face to face with our lord and eternally praising him.
Psalm16:11 says "In your presence is fullness of joy; at Your right hand are pleasures forevermore."
A person that we conceived is perfect and is forever praising God. A person that we conceived is at the throne forever praising God. One day me and my baby Hazel Hope will be standing together in the fullness of joy singing praise to our Lord together.

I posted this on a community blog... i thought that I would repost it on my own blog.

feet and hands...

Thank you to our family (you know who you are) for making this temporary headstone for us. We haven't ordered the permenant one. The rock we chose was a rose quartz but they couldn't sand blast it. So they took care of finding another rock and sandblasting it. It is still at her gravesite... but it has some bird poo on it.

My cousin took this picture at Hazel's service. Just thought that I would share. By the way... these are her real hand and feet prints. They scanned them in and were able to sandblast them true to size on the rock. What an awesome memory to see and touch.

not much to say

Not feeling to talkative the last few days. Enjoy this sweet pic of Aly when she was 7 months. A friend took this picture when we were camping last summer. Hugs to all.

her little big world

This is the world that aly lives in. These are the words that she can say. She has gotten to mimicking stage. Mostly the last word that you say she will say.
"do you want to go in the car or the truck"? "truck"
"do you want to go in the truck or the car"? "car"

mommy daddy book loud eva katie erica cody rachelle cracker apple hi money nose eye ear toe clothes toast cow towel hair stick down up close baby feet shoes bear eat monkey fish boots bed bath clock potty shower poo poo coat chair buckle toy car bug guy cookie elmo go ball walk tractor truck hot backpack bee bye todd papa hudy jesse emmy noisy milk push please egg bed juice water ice

almost all of these words anyone can understand.... milk (ka) water (wawa)

She had her 18 month appointment today. tall and thick. 95% for both. she is sure my big girl. I went shopping at the Carters outlet with a friend and was looking at the sizes thinking... I know that the carters 18 month pj's are getting to small. The 24 month size looks just huge, but I know that soon she will fit in it. Today she is wearing a 24mo onesie and a 3T skirt. Crazy how fast they grow. When she got her shots she was yelling Owwwweeee. So sad when they can actually tell you... "owwee mommy".

Maybe a little TMI.

I woke up last night at about 11pm to a voice in the distance. What was she saying? Was it poo poo? Then it was quiet again. Then again a little louder...pooooo pooooo. That was then followed by a meltdown crying fit. I jumped out of bed and hurried to her room. My little daughter had pooed her pants while she was sleeping and as she was pooing she woke herself up. She has been aware of the pooing process and is upset now when she goes in her diaper. She doesn't get to put the poo in the toilet and flush it. I think that since she was half-asleep she was more upset by the fact that she was awakened by pooing her diaper. She was groggy and crying while I changed her diaper in the middle of the night. I put her back in bed and tucked her and she was right back asleep. She hasn't done that since she was a baby. I hope that she doesn't start that cycle of pooing in the nighttime. She has gone already today on her little toilet. Such a big girl!

Another day down

B.fast

Cheerios&1% 150

Snack

Banana 80

Lunch

1/2 sandwich with turkey and mustard 145

Bit of Pork stir-fry leftovers 200

Snack

Yogurt 200

Dinner

Bit more of Pork stir-fry 200

Salad with Homemade veggie salsa 100

Dessert

Frozen Yogurt 120

Before bed snack

a few sips of silk soy chocolate milk 20

Exercise
I planted 20 1 gallon Kinnickinick plants.
Helped Mr. D pick up all the grass that he edged off the front yard... major leg and arm workout today. I was definitely feeling the results of only eating 1200 cals tonight as I was trying to continue helping with the project that we were trying to finish. But I know that it will be so worth it when I can fit back into my pre-pregnancy clothes that have been siting dormant waiting to see the sun again.

We went to library reading time this morning and I put Aly's hair up in the cutest piggy tails... I didn't get any pics because my camera batteries were dead. I also don't know where the back-up batteries are because of my special little helper.

today

Today
9am
Special K with 1%---- 210
Half Banana----------40
Water

Pulled weeds outside and watered plants

10:30
Aly and I shared some Non-fat Yogurt--110

12:45
Red/Green Lettuce(2 cups)----30cals
Handful grape tomatos---------25
1 yellow pepper----------------25
handful dried cranberries------150
slice of flax bread with jam-----110
Water
Total so far today 700...........500 to go for the rest of the day at it is 1:40pm. Not bad!
Pilates ab routine 25 minutes

5:15 dinner
Veggie Salsa--------50
2 Steak Flautas-----350


late night drink and snack with the girls
Vodka Martini-----170
Side of Veggies----45

Total--------------1305

Donkey, Doggy, Judy, Baby and Bear

Gangs all here.

Aly has gotten attached to a purple bunny. We named her "Judy" after Steven's Aunt Judy. She was here a few weeks ago and Aly picked up on her name right away. It is really cute when she says it so we had to name bunny that so we can hear her say it all the time. If "bunny judy" isn't in bed with her she will ask "Judy?" She loves to snuggle her close. Missing in this picture is baby... but you did get a bit of bears foot.



We were swimming yesterday and my mom bought her a blow-up donkey. She figured out how to bounce on it very quickly and she even caught on the the fact that we were calling it a donkey. She called it dunkee. Too cute. She can also play with Lego's now without putting then in her mouth. She loves to take a bunch and put them in a container and then take them out one by one. You know the little yellow dudes that are part of the Legos. She calls them "Guy". We have started to be able to actually have a two way conversation with her. She is beginning to have an opinion. She can say "ya" and "no" to a question that I ask her. Of course the answer that she gives isn't always the way that she gets to have things go.



Calorie monitoring is going well. I have lost 2 pounds already. Not bad for 1 week.

30 to go.

So my sis in law Shan and I are back in the saddle again of counting calories and working out. For me it has been a while since I have been on and off again prego over the last 2 years. It is just amazing how quickly my body adjusts to eating 1200 calories a day. I had a 3/4 of a can of tuna and a yellow bell pepper for lunch and I'm full. It really helps to write down the caloric intake...because at the end of the day on Friday I was only at 750... after dinner. So I got to have more dinner and a bit of chocolate frozen yougart to get me up to 1200 cals. I have the same amount of energy, actually even more now that I've been working out again. I'm so sick of looking the way I do and I'm determined not to stop until I lose 30 pounds. The losing always starts out slow... which doesn't help the motivation. But once my body resets it's metabolism and starts tapping into all that stored up fat I need to burn off... it will only be a matter of time before I start to shrink. I'm so looking forward to wearing all my old pre-prego clothes. I hope that they arn't to out of style.

Our nieghbors had married off one of their daughters this last Saturday. I helped do the flowers and decorate. The rain held off and it was such a beautiful wedding.

Yes I did, but she's not here.

I knew that it was going to happen sooner or later. I was at Target and ran into an old friend. She asked the dreaded question. "Hey did you have a baby?". I think that I handled it quite well. I didn't burst into tears, because I was having a low emotional day. I just proceeded with the conversation. Yes, I did have a baby but that she was still born. Yuck, I just don't like that word. Makes me feel like I failed at growing and birthing my baby. I told her the short version of what had happened. Water broke, Labor began, Hemorrhage, No heart beat, Baby girl born. She just stared wide-eyed at me probably thinking about the two children she had sitting in her grocery cart and wondering how she could have ever left the hospital without them. When I was telling her what had happened to me and how it was actually life-threatening to me and that I could have bled to death ( a thought that I have not completely dealt with yet) I felt like I was just talking about it so nonchalantly. It was like I was telling her a story about someone else that I knew and not myself. I feel like since I can talk about it without crying that I've gotten over it and moved on with my life. I know that is so not the case. I think about Hazel Hope so often and miss her so much. I have been trying to deal with the trauma of seeing others with babies that are 7 weeks old and not losing it. I think that I'm doing pretty well. I have a journal almost done that I've recapped the whole event... start to finish. Even though I put the journal down at the point of when we are at the hospital the next day and people are starting to come and see us. I have had to take breaks with that journal, because I've been so detailed with it that it is almost like reliving the short time that we had with our Hazel.

Me ~ God is doing a major work in my life. All revolving around Hazel Hope and her short little life. I have been awakened to the holy spirit that has been with me all along. I can hear the Lord speaking to me in the quiet moments that I'm concentrating on listening. I also have been writing what I've been hearing down. Thanks to Margie, because she has an amazing story to tell regarding that. Which in itself is a miracle work. I've started to run on the treadmill again.. which feels great. I haven't been able to because I was prego...nursing...prego. Things jiggle in places that never use to jiggle... I hope that I can just jiggle them away! Also, I've started a home business with Arbonne International. It is a Pure-Safe and Beneficial line of Swiss Skin Care. Check it out at www.arbonne.com I'm having fun telling people about the great product and I've even had people ask what I'm doing different with my skin. Makes a girl feel good.

Hey Boys

At Henry's 1st birthday party Aly was the only girl amongst lots of little boys. When we walked in the door to the party everyone was like... whoa a girl. I didn't bring her a swimsuit so she had to go swimming and playing in the sand leaving nothing to the imagination. But it didn't matter she got down and dirty all the same. If these two could talk would the conversation go something like this?

Henry- "Hey baby did you see my rake?"

Aly- "Yah I saw your rake... not to impressive".

Henry- "What about this sweet sand box I got for my birthday!"

Aly- "Now that I like. It is much cleaner than the sand I get to play in at my house. You should come over and see the dirt piles I play in."

Henry- "Hey can you get your hand off my foot, your cramping my style. I need some room to play you know".

Aly- "Sorry buddy, just giving you some birthday love".

one of my favorite days of the year

4th of July

Neighbors

Home Made Ice Cream

Fireworks

Smores

Friends

Family

Love

Laughter

Happy Faces

Home Cooked

Music

Dancing

Moonlight

Memories

Patriotic Songs

Flannel PJ Pants

nite nite.

This is what a tired little girl looks like after a bbq and playing in the sun and the dirt. She is all lathered up in sunscreen which does wonders when playing in the dry dirt. It is almost like I put a glue stick all over her... it just attracts dirt. She got a wipey bath before the ride home. She is at the stage of trying to say what ever we say. Everyday she says a new word. Hat, babyduck, buckle...etc. She is also at the stage of not wanting to eat in her highchair... what is up with that?